How can I tell people that I just want to be treated the same as everyone else? Sometimes talking about it all the time makes it worse. At school I just want to be me again…

Sometimes people don’t know what to say or do when someone close to them has a bereavement. They want to look after them and make sure they are ok. But the way they do this may not work for you, or it may be what you need sometimes but not at other times. It is ok to ask people not to treat you any differently. It’s ok to ask people to not to talk about it unless you bring the subject up. However, remember that they think they are being kind and are trying to support you, so how you talk to them about this is important. In school, a trusted adult may be able to do this for you instead of you having to tell so many people, especially if it is making you feel angry, sad, anxious or you just do not want to. Being treated the same as everyone else is important for some people after a bereavement. It can help you to remember that some parts of your life have stayed the same and feels safe and comfortable.  Tell someone close to you how you are feeling and let them help you tell others. Remember that people cannot see the thoughts in your head so it is important to be able to tell them what you need.

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